Titanic Steaming Lid

Youz talking to me? is what you say at your next picnic when asked to pass the ketchup. How do you not want a condiment gun? There’s not much about this one that needs explanation. Just make sure you keep it holstered when the kids are around.

It’s been a long week of zoom calls, home school disasters and Amazon delivery thefts. You go to reach for the corkscrew only to remember it’s still Dry January. A quick rummage through the panty is a reminder you finished the gummy bears and the Chips Ahoy went stale. A freezer burned teaspoon of Chunky Monkey sits lonely at the bottom of a dilapidated pint container. Worthless. For a second you think you remember how to make a cake. Then you also remember the time and effort even the quickest of Betty Crocker box mix entails. Enter the Keurig of ice cream to literally and figuratively cool your frantic, throttled up jets. Coldsnap is a countertop soft serve machine that takes meer minutes to produce a sweet, fresh, creamy antidote to your week of woes. Debuted at CES just weeks ago, the dessert gods have delivered everything but a link to purchase. Seems like it’s still in production. Coldsnap peeps made this cute little video to build the anticipation further. They say it should be shipping soon. Until then you’re stuck with Cookie Puss for a few more months.

Let’s face it, we’ve all been making, or trying to make, a lot of bread. In San Francisco they are taping sourdough starter to street poles. No lie. This apocalypse looks different to us in so many ways but never did we think baking would be at the epicenter of a lockdown. Enter the Balmuda Toaster or oven or steamer. Yeah, we’re not sure either but it definitely makes you look amazing when toasting up a slice of that aforementioned sourdough. Brass tacks, this Japanese designed feat-of-engineering has possibly taken our most mundane cooking task and up-leveled it with some NASA grade innovation. A water port allows you to fill a steam reservoir inside the toaster’s Ferrari grade heater core. This steam cloud envelops your bread allowing a faster, crisp without drying out. Now that the moisture is sealed in your slice, the steam dissipates and the heat fires up a second time. This result is a pillowy soft inside with a crisp, golden, toasted bark of tasty. Need more. Gen Terao, the CEO, built in several other settings for bread baking and high heat if you want to go full oven. A simple knob with pictures of bread styles leaves little room for error, unlike your sourdough process. With a black or white option it will compliment any kitchen and frankly out shine anything else in it including you. Save up your shekels though, performance and beauty like this come at a cost. We hope you are getting great at baking because you might not be able to afford store bought bread for a while after Balmuda ownership. Don’t sweat it, we think we’re spending 2020 at home anyway.

We love the dentist. Ok…I love the dentist. I also love weird mashups particularly if they consider the dinnertable. For most, drinking from a Porcelain Dentist Cup while enjoying a delicious meal would be like a 4X UBER surge after front row seats to Hamilton. I’d go so far as to serve some neon blue cocktail in these to further conjure the inspector gadget dental chair. Fish’s Eddy embraces this contrast with the newest in their quirky line up. Although, their dentist cup was probably intended for the bathroom not the dining room. Does that make me weird?